This I Know

"I DON'T KNOW WHAT MY FUTURE HOLDS........BUT I KNOW WHO HOLDS IT." Oprah Winfrey

That was the feeling I've had all my life, now Oprah has so put it into words for me.

I wanted, and expected to get, all I wanted and deserved in life. I made this decision (subconsciously), as a small child. My favorite shirt said "I was Born Entitled!" When asked what I was entitled to, I told them "anything I wanted," even if I had to mop floors, wait tables and work my behind off. Everyone can do it, the Universe puts it out there and the choice is yours. I did not come from means. No family inheritance but a desire, confidence and pride in myself to make it happen. I knew what I wanted and valued myself and would not settle for less. After I graduated from high school, I went to college, had some fun jobs, waitress, secretary and stewardess. I got married to someone that was educated, strong and healthy and driven to also do well (an airline pilot). Together we built a nice family and had enough to live nicely on the rest of our lives. Thirty years later he walked out on the girls and I, which prompted me to send him a "thank you Note" for leaving. Sure there were tears, anger, hate etc., but never self-doubt. I immediately jumped in to make a new life for my family. I bought us a new home, got the twins through college and happily married. I went back to college with the girls and got a job as Concierge.......and started traveling. I had time to enjoy my many talents of sewing, knitting, writing, reading, painting, piano, volunteering, Spanish lessons and grandchildren. The children encouraged me to learn the computer, know how to email, face book, and blog. The cell phone is great and I can text. Love my digital camera. I challenged myself to be a public speaker after completing a course in NLP, and spoke on a couple of cruise ships, under the umbrella of "Life Enrichments." I Set a goal of 100 countries by the time I was 70, did it and on to 120+, and 48 of the 50 states, and 6 of the 7 continents.

In my life have I given all I could? Probably not, but I have tried to pay back a little for my many blessings. I have tried to set an example for my three daughters and nine grandchildren, to do good, to be the best you can be and to realize: "YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOUR FUTURE HOLDS, BUT NEVER FORGET WHO HOLDS THAT FUTURE."

Kiss a Frog

24 years ago next month since I was cast back into the dating scene............Grim. All my well meaning friends kept trying to find me someone wonderful, or fun or nice or whatever, to spend my new found "singleness" with. I wasn't too excited about it, but I tried. Could I ever trust or respect a man again? I was pretty bitter. My daughter's cute friend Jon asked them if I would go out with this guy in his ward who had seen me a a farewell and wanted to go out with me. Well, he called, I agreed and we settled on golf and dinner. Harmless! When he arrived late, we cancelled golf and settled for dinner. "Did I like Mexican food?". I do, so that was easily settled and we have quite a few nice Mexican restaurants in my area. He was nice looking, drove a nice car and worked for Albertsons Food. We drove out of my condo area and across the street and pulled into a Taco Bell. A taco bell! I went along. We went in, he ordered three tacos for a dollar and two lemon aides which were a dollar piece. He had to write a check for $3.32. We found a table and chatted away while we ate. He ate two, without even offering me a bite of the second one.........right then I knew this was my last date with him..........maybe anyone. I just escaped from the cheapest man on earth and was not about to do it again. Besides I can buy my own three for a dollar tacos and lemon aide and enjoy my own company. We ended the date by taking a ride up the canyon......(free. ) Did I kiss this frog to be sure he wasn't my prince? I don't think so! So now you know the story of my "Taco Date"........Is that what first dates 30 years after my time are like?

So I say to all out there dating, "Past behavior is an indication of future behavior" so know where you are heading with each new date.

Hanging In There

Up early and got my daughter and her youngest son off to California and Disney Land for a week. Her oldest son and husband are in Europe and her daughter is at EFY, busy, busy family. I have the dogs, Marley and Izzy, for the week. They are both darling huge dogs and Marley and I are in a battle for Alfa Dog of this house. He doesn't like the squirt bottle, so I have a weapon on my side. He is a real lover, but very demanding. I will keep you posted.

Do you ever feel someone else is responsible for your happiness? I think we all do sometimes. Well no one is. Each of us is responsible for our own happiness. Anyone who sits around and waits for someone else to make you happy is going to be very disappointed and unfulfilled. Continually postponing happiness for some future time--by saying "When so and so happens, then I will be happy". Do you belong to the "If Only" club.? If only I could lose 20 pounds, if only I had more money, if only I could find a mate, have a baby, get a bigger house or better job! If you are a member of the "If Only" club it is robbing you of the one thing any of us already has: it is the present. When we live in the past or focus too much on the future, we rob ourselves of the now.............A child's story: THE MISSING PIECE, It is the story of a circle that has a part missing. It searches and searches for it's missing piece, just as most of us are always looking for that "piece", just as most of us are always looking for that "piece" of fulfillment we think is necessary for our happiness. When the circle finally finds it's missing piece, it realizes that the search was more meaningful and exciting than the results. As the circle learned, what counts in life is each moment of the journey----not our final destination. Life is made up of millions of moments, and once a moment is over, it never comes back. We have to enjoy each one as it happens.

Things To Think About...........

Everyone has advice and ideas of their own on a guide to a happy life. I think most are worth looking at: Here are some more.

No one will ever get out of this world alive. Resolve therefore to maintain a reasonable sense of values.

Take care of yourself. Good health is every one's major source of wealth. Without it, happiness is almost impossible.

Resolve to be cheerful and helpful. People will repay you in kind.

Avoid angry abrasive persons. They are generally vengeful.

Resolve to listen more and to talk less. No one ever learns anything by talking.

Be Leary of giving advice. Wise men don't need it and fools won't heed it.

Resolve to be tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving and tolerant of the weak and the wrong. Sometime in life you will have been all of these.

Do not equate money with success. There are many successful money makers who are miserable failures as human beings. What counts most about success is how a person achieves it.

This is a hard time for many young and old and I fear it will only get worse. I do hope we can take it upon our selves to make the most out of what we ourselves are......not go into the theme of the "waiting game".

Matryoshka Dolls

Everyone falls in love with the cute little stacking or nesting dolls from from Russia called Matryoshka dolls. I have several sets I picked up on my trip to Russia. My grandchildren have loved taking them apart and trying to get them to all fit back together. They are painted in bright colors and the sets have branched out into animals, government leaders, sports teams, fairy tail characters etc.
Matryoshka dolls ---derived from "Matryona" a female name referring to a large, fat, strong woman. The first Russian dolls were created in 1890 in children's Education Workshop in Abramtsevo near Moscow. They are used metaphorically as a design paradigm, know as "Matryoshka principle". It denotes a recognizable relationship of similar objects--within--similar--objects that appears in the design.
As I look at this little doll I can't help but wonder if the little doll with 11 more just like it nestled inside "constitute one doll or if they are really 12 different dolls, with separate selves and souls."
My first thought is that this little fat, happy looking doll is the image of the mother with her little ones tucked close inside to her heart as is a "mothering thing" the world over. Or is this just a person with many faces that help her pass through life. The Matryoshka doll could very easily be a metaphor of each of us and our lives. Yes, I have a mother face, a social face, a concerned face, a worried face, a happy face, a sad face and many more-----don't we all? As we peel off our layers, much like peeling onions layer by layer we get down to the "Heart" that is really the center of our lives. These layers are all alike-----but different. "Our spirit and our body are combined in such a way that our body becomes an instrument of our mind and the foundation of our character." Boyd K. Packer It is so interesting how a little wooden doll brought back from a vacation can lead to a metaphor of my life..........

Back Packing in Europe

"These are the magic years......and therefore magic days.......and therefore magic moments."

I cannot believe this cute little boy, my third grandson, is all grown up (16) and heading out tonight with his father and another father and son for a two week back-packing trip through Europe.

I am so thrilled because I was able to take my three girls on many wonderful trips around the world when they were young. When my girls returned from two weeks in Europe or Asia or South Pacific they really appreciated the life they had in America. They took all the different foods, money, languages, different bathrooms, toilet papers, towels and even soap in and in their stride, never complaining. I felt this was the best education I could give them, they still love to travel and encourage travel in their families. Last year my second grandson went to Europe for three weeks with the Young Ambassadors of America. Now it's Richies turn. His dad Big Rich, has no idea what he is in for and it will be the best thing that ever happened to him. He is coming up 46 and pretty set in his ways and has NEVER traveled, sooooooooo. Seems the biggest concern was the bedbugs in the hostels they will be staying in. I made each of them a sheet they can use each night then fold up and pack away each day. At least clean sheets. Wonder how often they will do laundry? If it was up to the kids probably not till they got home. They get on the airplane at midnight and fly to New York. Never been to New York so will do some sight seeing tomorrow. Tomorrow night, they fly to Ireland and on to Paris, France. Here is where the back-packing starts with a train pass through Germany, Italy, Chez Republic etc. So many wonderful experiences for all of them, I can hardly wait till they get home to hear about the BIG ADVENTURE.

MEASURING LIFE

Positive thinking get positive results! I read a cute story about a jar of marbles. This fellow got to thinking.......if life started out with a jar of marbles and our life's expectancy is 75 years that is 52 weeks in a year times 75 years then in a average life you have 390 Saturdays to lay around, watch tv or go fishing. So if you started taking one marble out every Saturday that you have lived, by the time you are 75 that jar would be empty. That's scary, I would have emptied my jar three years ago. I considered planning on living another 10 years and put these in a jar and take one out each week, but that is just like watching yourself die. It's bad enough to know everyday we live is one less in the ones we have left to live. Have you ever gotten a fortune cookie that says "Take control of your destiny!" Don't be adrift at sea, so to speak. You need a clear direction or a goal, then you don't just drift, and drift, gaining pounds, spending money, letting the piles get higher. Get in that boat and start paddling in a chosen direction."One of the surprising discoveries of positive psychology, a field that investigates what leads to happiness, is the contentment and a sense of meaning in life doesn't arise from the usual suspects, like winning the lottery, or being young and beautiful, but from among other things, the pursuit and attainment of goals." Any goal has to be your own idea. A passion of yours and for your own reason. It should be time specific and reasonable and realistic. The goal should fit into your values, beliefs and life's purpose. If you commit it in writing , in black and white, it gives you a more concrete and clear focus. So bag the marbles and go for it, one day at a time!